We almost all now belong to a platform for some sort of online conversation, whether it be Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter, Digg, or (insert favorite social media website).

With the recent ability to set up groups or “channels” around special topics, users can create meeting halls to hold conversations.

Have you ever noticed that most of these are dead zones?

Usually all activity is produced by the one ignorant marketer who keeps posting press releases about “Company X Revolutionizes Technical Process with Keyword Phrase Nobody Cares About”.  Over time, the room becomes empty as this person keeps posting useless drivel and reports back to their supervisor that yes, they do indeed have a social media presence. ‘Don’t worry boss, I’m on it’.

This same mindset of spray and pray has carried over from traditional media. Instead of a print ad in a trade publication, we now have it as a post on one of these websites. It seems the mindset is, “Let me shout at you about stuff you don’t care about, whether you gave me permission to or not.”

I don’t think these marketers fully appreciate how much they alienate those online. This deafness coupled with the ease to join and create online networks results in a lot of wasted opportunity and brand equity.

Here are three tips to avoid making similar mistakes in your efforts using social media to communicate within your network:

1. Spam people about your company/cause/cousin’s makeup line. You might friend me on Facebook and now I’m receiving constant invitations to “Like” the cosmetic line your cousin is selling. I’m a male. Don’t you remember that when you met me? If in doubt, look at my profile photo. It has a fake moustache Photoshopped in. You can’t miss it.  Put a bit of thought into your audience and really make sure it passes the “who gives a rip filter”. However, if this cause or product does indeed match up with a shared interest, then yes I might be interested to know. Otherwise, you just look rude.
2. Talk about your “exciting” new product launch. This is especially prevalent on LinkedIn. You might join a group around a topic like high-tech marketing. The next thing you see is a consultant group pushing blog posts. My most recent email update from a LinkedIn group on the topic of high tech marketing included no less seven different posts by the same author around the topic of interns over 40.  Not one of these dealt with high-tech marketing and nobody else had posted anything to the group. Over time this quickly chokes out the honest dialogue between marketing managers trying to get honest answers to problems.
3. Provide no value back to the community. The best people to follow on Twitter are the ones that put out a helpful link or tip. They know Rule #1 of Marketing is that the audience wants to know what’s in it for them. Hey, we’re all self-centered and impatient. Make me better at what I do or am passionate about and now you’ve earned my trust. The savvy marketer who does this consistently over time establishes themselves as a though-leader within the community.  Good things come to those that lead.

Using social media is really like going to a cocktail party.  We’ve all been pinned down by the person who goes on and on about their dull job and has nothing interesting to say.  Yet, there are those that are interesting, curious people and they quickly have a small group surrounding them, laughing and discussing things.

I think we all know who we’d like to have a drink with.